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Louisa Harwood's avatar

Ethel Kennedy said this when asked about the loss of her son, David... "Does the hole that they leave in you when they die, does it ever get any smaller?” And she said, “It never gets any smaller. But our job is to grow ourselves bigger around the hole."

And we do that by taking the best qualities, the best, most admirable character traits of the person that died and integrating them with restraint, with discipline, with practice into our own character. In doing that, we make ourselves larger and the hole gets proportionately smaller.

But we also give a kind of immortality to the person who left us, because their work continues through us.

Shawn Gibson's avatar

Beautifully written from the heart ❤️❤️❤️❤️

Donald J Williamson's avatar

India, your boys will carry you on their shoulders while you navigate these early stages of grieving for your wonderful mother. The rollercoaster of emotions takes us by surprise, but the joy your sons are bringing you will see you through it. Looking forward to watching England play Argentina on Wednesday. I'll be thinking of you all. God bless!

Holly Chevalier's avatar

My dear India, I hear your words so well. My mother passed away last year and we were close. It hurts to not be able to simply pick up the phone to speak with her, to exchange what we did that day … While she was in the hospital I was grabbed with a real fear that I would never be able to get over this, that my grief would be with me forever. Of course it’s there but I remember distinctly a couple of weeks after her passing, I was back with my daughter and we began laughing for some reason and I suddenly felt elated by the fact that I was still me, my laughter and sense of humour were still intact. I was no longer letting my grief get the best of me. It raises its head every now and then, usually when I least expect it. Yes, it’s cruel but life does indeed go on. It’s hard though. All my thoughts are with you during this time and am thrilled for your two sons with their business!

Beverly Snow's avatar

My mother died at the age of 50, 54 years ago. There is always a sense of loss, although it changes over time. The grief dissipates, but is still present. I visit her grave as often as I can in the summer, on the Cape Cod island where I grew up. She is there with other family, and I will eventually join her there. Comforting, not maudlin.

tricia freeman's avatar

Thank you for sharing......

Thouraya Sayess's avatar

How beautifully said, India. May joy always be yours (it suits you ;-)) and may you find strength in the big love you hold for those who matter most to you 🙏♥️

Notes from a Bookstagrammer's avatar

Thank you for sharing. Yes, grief can make one feel entirely alone. There is also joy at the same time. Reading about your sons is heartwarming. I loved that photo of them together. They are not afraid to show affection for each other, which is wonderful. I have been following the World Cup stories on social media.

Charlotte Brown's avatar

So beautifully expressed, India!

Elizabeth Wiggs Cooper's avatar

Thank you for the link to their new venture! And for your hopeful facing post.

CE Hay's avatar

Brilliant thought! I imagine your Mother would have suggested that anecdote.

Clare McDonald's avatar

So well said India! This is how it works, sending you big hugs! xo

Monica Haggerty Jaekels's avatar

I love the healing from the next generation! Your mother is proud of you.

🩷🩷

Wallis Jewelry Connoisseur's avatar

We never know how deeply we will grieve the loss of a parent until we lose one. Jesus came for my Mom on 5/20/2019. Her event that led to her departure was on 5/19/19. A day I did not expect it. I couldn’t believe it and still can’t. No words can express my loss and my sense of isolation. Jesus has been carrying me since as He is carrying you.