What a perfect elegy for your lovely and beloved Mother. The hardest thing I’ve yet to endure was the loss of my own mother, at age 91, in 2013. I still talk to her frequently. Sometimes I can hear her voice, answering me. You and I have been blessed to have mothers that we will always grieve. Not everyone is so lucky.
Keep talking to her. She will sometimes answer - you’ll know when she does. And may the peace of the Lord be always with you and your family.
Thank you for sharing these thoughts and experiences with us. Your words are so tender and loving. You have brought your mother back to the forefront of our thoughts. I love your comparisons to a wedding, very apt It’s great that she left instructions since you were able to implement and understand her wishes and conduct a ceremony that she would have wanted. You loved and honored her in life and death. Well done!
Stunning words. “Grief is the price we pay for love, QEII” is carved in a pillar at St. Thomas’ Episcopal Church in NYC. It was intended as a comfort to those lost in the tragic World Trade Center attack. Those words are the words that stick with me. You two had a love that goes beyond space and time. I send you peace.
This was really beautiful. And you really hit the nail on the head. No one who hasn't planned a funeral - or helped plan it - really knows what it's like. It's like an event that usually takes weeks but it happens in days. And you're the one grieving, why do you have to be the one to worry if there's enough food, or if so and so will be offended by something you think isn't worth thinking about, or isn't it time for everyone to leave already? But there you are, doing it. My mother also died in her mid 90's not long ago. And while you know it's going to happen soon enough, you're annoyed that when you can't remember your grandmother's sister's name she isn't there to ask what it is. Or that you can't ask her where she wants to go for brunch next Sunday. Then you remember. And then you go take a nap. I'm so sorry for your loss.
This was a good farewell, beautifully written. You will carry her with you now as you travel as she's in your thoughts and what you do. She's also in your sons and daughter as they move out into the world too.
Because the truth is - we never really lose the people we love. “They are in the sunsets, and in the rain, and in the forests, and in laughter, and music that takes our breath away. We never really lose their love, their beauty, because that energy doesn't disappear — it finds new ways to reach you.”
I felt the same way about my mother when she died suddenly in Feb 2017. Who is ever ready for the death of a beloved parent? No one. I still have things belonging to my mother, including her engagement portrait, which I admit, at the ripe old age of 64, I still “hug” from time to time. It just makes me feel better. I lost my father 18months later. However, my mother was….it seems, the glue…much like Lady Pamela. Unique. Original. Priceless and forever cherished. You’ll get there. Grief is a process and it’s personal, and there is no timeline. God Bless. Take care. From Nashville Tennessee.
Come February it will be ten years since my mother left yet not a day goes by without a memory of her in it. These days it’s more often a smile at a thought than the salt tide pricking at the eyes, but there are times the grief still hits in an unexpected wave.
Your writing is so beautiful and fresh even in such a sad moment in your life. I’m sure your mother enjoyed reading every word you ever chose, and always will from where she is now. I hope you find peace soon
Beautiful! So moving and so real! How do you get over loosing a person so extraordinary in every way. The advice from your friend so resonated with me, it is truly the only thing you can do, “You do not get over it. You just get on with it.” You were so fortunate to have had her doing so well for so many years. I have enjoyed every second of all your interviews with her. No wonder Her Majesty selected her as her companion, who would't?
Oh, India, we so feel for you and your entire family. I believe we have enjoyed your sharing of your Mother’s words, quips and stories not because she has such a prominent place in history, but because those of us who no longer had a Mom here in front of us, could smile and enjoy your Mom. Peace and comfort that’s what I wish for you. We never lay the grief completely aside but there are moments when we embrace the warmth they left behind.
What a perfect elegy for your lovely and beloved Mother. The hardest thing I’ve yet to endure was the loss of my own mother, at age 91, in 2013. I still talk to her frequently. Sometimes I can hear her voice, answering me. You and I have been blessed to have mothers that we will always grieve. Not everyone is so lucky.
Keep talking to her. She will sometimes answer - you’ll know when she does. And may the peace of the Lord be always with you and your family.
Thank you for sharing these thoughts and experiences with us. Your words are so tender and loving. You have brought your mother back to the forefront of our thoughts. I love your comparisons to a wedding, very apt It’s great that she left instructions since you were able to implement and understand her wishes and conduct a ceremony that she would have wanted. You loved and honored her in life and death. Well done!
Stunning words. “Grief is the price we pay for love, QEII” is carved in a pillar at St. Thomas’ Episcopal Church in NYC. It was intended as a comfort to those lost in the tragic World Trade Center attack. Those words are the words that stick with me. You two had a love that goes beyond space and time. I send you peace.
This was really beautiful. And you really hit the nail on the head. No one who hasn't planned a funeral - or helped plan it - really knows what it's like. It's like an event that usually takes weeks but it happens in days. And you're the one grieving, why do you have to be the one to worry if there's enough food, or if so and so will be offended by something you think isn't worth thinking about, or isn't it time for everyone to leave already? But there you are, doing it. My mother also died in her mid 90's not long ago. And while you know it's going to happen soon enough, you're annoyed that when you can't remember your grandmother's sister's name she isn't there to ask what it is. Or that you can't ask her where she wants to go for brunch next Sunday. Then you remember. And then you go take a nap. I'm so sorry for your loss.
I so often have questions and now won’t get answers
I know. Sometimes I think it's the worst part. For me that lasted the longest.
There seem to be more now the longer she has been gone. We used to talk a lot and I find it sad there are gaps.
This was a good farewell, beautifully written. You will carry her with you now as you travel as she's in your thoughts and what you do. She's also in your sons and daughter as they move out into the world too.
Because the truth is - we never really lose the people we love. “They are in the sunsets, and in the rain, and in the forests, and in laughter, and music that takes our breath away. We never really lose their love, their beauty, because that energy doesn't disappear — it finds new ways to reach you.”
Bianca Sparacino, A Gentle Reminder
Sending love. ❤️
I felt the same way about my mother when she died suddenly in Feb 2017. Who is ever ready for the death of a beloved parent? No one. I still have things belonging to my mother, including her engagement portrait, which I admit, at the ripe old age of 64, I still “hug” from time to time. It just makes me feel better. I lost my father 18months later. However, my mother was….it seems, the glue…much like Lady Pamela. Unique. Original. Priceless and forever cherished. You’ll get there. Grief is a process and it’s personal, and there is no timeline. God Bless. Take care. From Nashville Tennessee.
Come February it will be ten years since my mother left yet not a day goes by without a memory of her in it. These days it’s more often a smile at a thought than the salt tide pricking at the eyes, but there are times the grief still hits in an unexpected wave.
Your words were beautiful, I wish you courage.
Your writing is so beautiful and fresh even in such a sad moment in your life. I’m sure your mother enjoyed reading every word you ever chose, and always will from where she is now. I hope you find peace soon
What a heartfelt & loving tribute 💔
Thank you for Sharing Her all these years.
May her memory be a Grace for your hearts.
Beautifully written. Love and hugs from Canada
The way she wanted it, that was beautiful 💙🙏✝️
You are never more a raw child than when your parent dies. So sorry. So relate. You shared her with us but she was yours. Blessings.
Beautiful! So moving and so real! How do you get over loosing a person so extraordinary in every way. The advice from your friend so resonated with me, it is truly the only thing you can do, “You do not get over it. You just get on with it.” You were so fortunate to have had her doing so well for so many years. I have enjoyed every second of all your interviews with her. No wonder Her Majesty selected her as her companion, who would't?
That was beautiful!
Oh, India, we so feel for you and your entire family. I believe we have enjoyed your sharing of your Mother’s words, quips and stories not because she has such a prominent place in history, but because those of us who no longer had a Mom here in front of us, could smile and enjoy your Mom. Peace and comfort that’s what I wish for you. We never lay the grief completely aside but there are moments when we embrace the warmth they left behind.