SMALL KID AGAINST BIG MONSTER

I’ve spoken about Global Empowerment Mission’s work in Ukraine, it’s a story of movement, urgency, and response.

But what is the story of a young mother living in Kyiv? How does she keep hope alive in a place where the skies aren't safe, where life happens around the sound of drones and the flicker of blackouts and when the city shifts underground during airstrikes. What is that like?

My friend Olga and I sat down together when I was in Ukraine this time. She is the mother of Daniel aged 6 and Zachary aged 1.

How do you explain the sounds of war to your 6-year-old son? Or do you try not to?

We do not want to scare him or teach him hatred from childhood, but our duty is to explain everything that is happening. We explain that the neighboring country is an invader, it occupies our lands and attacks our cities, increasing its territory and reducing our numbers.

What brings you moments of peace—or even beauty—amid the chaos?

I think this is my family, children, husband. And memories of what a fantastic country Ukraine was. I hope that everything will return and we will live like before.

Are there rituals or routines you’ve created to help your children feel safe?

Unfortunately, the main ritual that can provide at least some security is sleeping in the corridor behind two walls. My eldest son knows that when dad is not at home, we immediately go to sleep in the corridor on the floor, I do this so that I can quickly run out of the apartment with the children in case of something, and if there is ballistics, I will not have time to pick up the children, because ballistics fly for 3 minutes. I do not want the children to hear what is happening outside the window, so at night we always play classical music or white noise.

What does motherhood look like during wartime?

Very difficult. It's hard to control your emotions, there are days when you're on the verge of a nervous breakdown, you can't control yourself you don't want to play with your children, you want to cry or scream in the forest, but you keep it all inside yourself and try to be a good mother and support for your children.

Do you allow yourself moments of fear—or do you feel you always have to be strong?

Fear overshadows your thoughts. I try to keep myself in check, because I am mostly alone at home with the children and I am responsible for their safety but sometimes I start having panic attacks, my heart beats fast, I can't breathe and my hands prick, but I pull myself together and calm down.

Have you found ways to celebrate birthdays, milestones, or small joys despite everything?

Yes, we celebrate all the holidays, we get together with our parents, with friends, in such conditions in which we live you start to appreciate life more.

How do you manage the worry when Vitaly leaves for the front lines?

My husband started humanitarian work from the first days of the war, I didn't understand that it could become something serious and a part of our lives. I was against it, I didn't want him to do it. I didn't want him to risk his life going to very dangerous parts of the country.

But he said that he couldn't sit and do nothing, he wants to help, support people, bring back hope, he understands that it's a risk. I accepted his choice and I will always support him if it's so important to him.

Do you talk about the future together? What does hope look like for your family?

One day we plan the future, a house, a dog, we plan our future trips, we have big ambitions, to rebuild our business, we plan to save money, but after another night terror I catch myself thinking that I want to run away, far away, I just want to save our children.

I hope for the end of war, the end of death, passenger planes back in the sky, when people are not afraid of the noise from the street, you go to bed and are not afraid of anything, children who do not run to shelters, people who smile to each other, plans, dreams, businesses that blooming up, the economy that is rising, and many tourists in the Ukrainian cities watching the sunrise.

What do you want people outside Ukraine to know?

Please do not judge Ukrainian mother’s who stay here with their children despite the threats. We are afraid that we will not cope on our own if we leave. We are afraid to build a new life in a foreign country, it is difficult for us not knowing the language, it is difficult for us to leave our husbands, we are afraid to be away from home. We want to stay here in Ukraine.

But Ukraine needs support, we are small kid against big monster.

I believe that we have a big future, but we can’t handle it without support.